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The Key to a Fulfilling Life

One of the great challenges of life is living it according to the way we were designed. Part of the challenge is simply understanding who we are. By the way, how are you different from those around you? How have you answered the great question of life: 'Who am I?'

Today, let's look at three aspects of who you are; that is, who God designed you to become. As you understand and explore these variables, you'll begin to see how God wants you - uniquely from everyone else - to live your life. When you discover that, you'll have discovered the key to a fulfilling life.

Number one: For a Christian, one part of who we are relates to spiritual gifts. Spiritual gifts, as the term suggests, are outright gifts given to each of us through God the Holy Spirit. They come to us not because we deserve them, but despite the fact that we don't deserve them. Most of them are given to equip us for the privilege of strengthening and building up fellow believers in their love for, and their walk with, Jesus Christ.

The Scriptures do not give us a comprehensive list of spiritual gifts. However, God gives us a sampling of them in such passages as Romans 12, 1 Corinthians 12, Ephesians 4 and 1 Peter 4. The nineteen mentioned here include such gifts as: teaching, leading, serving, giving hospitality, showing mercy, contributing money, and bringing the Gospel to others. In another message, we will explore these gifts in more detail. For today, I am simply summarizing them and reminding you that part of discovering who you are comes from understanding what spiritual gift or gifts God has given you to use for His glory.

Number two: As we ask the "Who am I?" question, another part of the answer lies in our natural gifts. These may include such abilities as sports, art, music, analytical reasoning, dexterity and conceptual reasoning.

Margaret Broadley reports that we each are born with an average of six such aptitudes. Unfortunately, most jobs are said to require only one or two of these, leaving a wide open door for employment dissatisfaction.

Various aptitude tests have been developed to identify these gifts, and can help a person find a properly fitting niche in which to operate.

Some spend a great deal of time trying to distinguish between spiritual gifts and natural gifts. Please, don't be distracted by that! Why not? Because whether spiritual or natural, they are gifts given to you from God. Once you gain a reasonably good understanding of His gifts to you, my advice is to stop studying them and start using them!

Number three: A third factor in discovering who we are is personality. If you and I had the same set of spiritual gifts and the same set of natural gifts, we may still be quite different individuals because of personality.

Bill, an entrepreneur, seems to need a high level of control over those around him. Jim, a pastor, wants to influence people through persuasion rather than autocratic direction. Susan, an executive secretary, works best in an environment characterized by steady routine. Her personality is a contrast to that of Sharon, a sales representative who thrives on the flexibility and unpredictability of her schedule.

Paul, an accountant, is careful to dot every "i" and cross every "t" in his work. When coloring with crayons as a child, he probably always stayed between the lines and totally colored everything on the page before going on to the next picture.

Jack, on the other hand, probably colored a little bit on some pages, skipped others, and in general didn't care a whole lot about lines! Today a real estate developer, he's still a free spirit who would drive procedure-manual writers to drink.

One model used frequently over the years examines personality as revealed through our unique social styles. It looks at HOW we interact and WHAT we tend to interact with most comfortably.

Imagine a line going across a piece of paper. Our assertiveness can be estimated along that horizontal line, the left side more passive and the right side more aggressive. People to the left tend to be "askers" and people to the right tend to be "tellers."

Askers—Tellers

Now, in your imagination, draw a vertical line down the middle of that piece of paper. Our people-orientation can be estimated along that vertical line, those in the upper half more task-oriented and those in the lower half more people-oriented, as compared with the population in general. When you're done with this imaginary page of paper, you have two lines, one horizontal and one vertical, intersecting in the middle of the page. On the left side of the horizontal line is the word "Asker" and on the right side is the word "Teller." On the top of the vertical line is the word "Task-oriented" and on the bottom of that line is the word "People-oriented."

We each tend to fit predominately into one of the four quadrants formed by those two intersecting lines. Task-oriented Askers - that is, those who fit into the upper left-hand quadrant - are generally "Analytical." People-oriented Askers - that is, those who fit into the lower left-hand quadrant - are generally quite "Amiable." A typical research scientist would fit into the Analytical quadrant, whereas a person in the Amiable category may be attracted to the field of counseling psychology.

Task-oriented Tellers - that is, those who fit into the upper right-hand quadrant - are often seen as having a "Driving" personality. They want to control things and people. People-oriented Tellers - that is, those who fit into the lower right-hand quadrant—are generally more "Expressive" than other people. For example, you'll see them gesturing a lot with their hands as they talk. Career-wise, a Driving person may enjoy starting his or her own business, while the Expressive person may find more satisfaction in a sales career.

Now, let's try to put these two factors - gifts and personality - together for a moment. Imagine that you have four children. Each child has a deep interest in and flair for music. Should they all become trumpeters like uncle Harry? Before you decide, consider other features of your offspring.

Jimmy is the studious one, and loves computers. Jackie is Miss Congenial, diligent in work and a wonderful friend to work beside. Jerry makes quick decisions, is high in energy and low in patience, and likes to be the boss. Jill is outgoing, smiles readily, and likes being in the center of the action.

If these children give their musical abilities to God in lifestyle worship, will they all do the same thing? Probably not! Because of their personalities, I can see Jimmy the Student composing music, Jackie the Friend singing in a good choir, Jerry the Driver conducting Jackie's choir, and Jill the Extrovert as a trumpet soloist. Musicians all, yet quite distinct.

Listening friend, I don't know your gifts and I don't know your personality, but I do know the God who loves you. As you go through the coming day, may your gifts and your personality bring glory to Him!